These six specific behaviours will increase self-esteem, enhance your self-confidence, and encourage you to be more motivated. Using hypnotherapy can quickly increase these effects making them doubly effective. You may recognise some of these as things you already do in your interactions with other people. But if you do not already use them, motivate yourself to use hypnotherapy and to take on some of these behaviours. You will notice the difference.
First: greet others with a smile and always look them directly in the eye. A smile and direct eye contact sends the message “I am confident”. If you do not feel that confident, the secret is to behave as if you are already confident and it then becomes a natural behaviour for you. When you answer the phone in the office or at home, and when make a call, give your name before asking to speak to the person you want to reach. Leading with your name underscores that you are a person with self-respect. Self-confidence is another personal aspect that can be helped in our hypnotherapy sessions.
Second: always show real appreciation for a gift or compliment. Never downplay or side-step expressions of affection or praise. The ability to receive praise or compliments is a mark of an individual with solid self-esteem. Make a point that you will accept the next compliment on how good you look or how well you have performed some task. Practise always makes perfect. Using visualisations in hypnotherapy is a great way to practise.
Third: do not brag. It’s almost a paradox that genuine modesty is actually part of the capacity to gracefully receive compliments. People who boast about their own achievements are simply trying to build themselves up in the eyes of others – and that’s because they do not see themselves as already worthy of respect. Be proud of your achievements, but be careful how you talk about them. Hypnosis can help get that control over the link between thoughts and speaking.
Fourth: do not make your problems the centrepiece of conversation. Talk positively about your life and the progress you’re trying to make. Be aware of your negative talking, and take notice of how often you complain about anything, or everything. When you hear yourself criticise someone, and this includes self-criticism, find a way to be helpful and constructive instead of cynical and critical. Mistakes in life are the building blocks to a better future. No-one gets it right first time, every time. I have sometimes used, in hypnotherapy, the analogy of the story of Goldilocks and the lesson that story teaches. Start thinking of problems, not as problems, but as challenges. Whenever you hear yourself use the word “problem” change it to “challenge”.
Fifth: respond to difficult times, or depressing moments, by increasing your level of productive activity. When your self-esteem is being challenged, do not sit around and fall victim to “paralysis by analysis.” Vehicles in motion use their generators to charge their own batteries. Unless you happen to be a golf cart, you can’t recharge your battery when you’re parked in the garage! Motivation for change can be improved in the hypnotherapy sessions.
Sixth: choose to see mistakes and rejections as opportunities to learn. View a failure as the conclusion of one performance, not the end of your entire career. Own up to your shortcomings, but refuse to see yourself as a failure. A failure may be something you have done – and it may even be something you’ll do again on the way to success – but a failure is definitely not something you are. Even if you’re at a point where you’re feeling very negative about yourself, be aware that you are ideally positioned to make rapid and dramatic improvement. A negative self-evaluation, if it’s honest and insightful, takes much more courage and character than the self-delusions that underlie arrogance and conceit. This can be the emotional roller coaster ride that hypnotherapy brings.
These truths have been proven many times. Disappointment, defeat, and even apparent failure are in no way permanent conditions unless we choose to make them so. The hypnotherapy techniques we use can enhance positive changes in you.
Kent Hypnotherapy 